I'm not a parent myself but you should definitely learn to balance the two. If your child does something wrong, punish them in a way that isn't harmful to their mental or physical health. My parents spanked me as a child and I think that might have been one of the reasons why I have anxiety. You need to also set up boundaries to ensure that your children are learning in a healthy way. Mistakes are going to happen and your children will get mad at you for taking away their phones or electronic devices. Let them get upset now, to learn that their negative actions have consequences. Push them to do things in a healthy way, not an overbearing way.